BunBuns! How has your holiday season been so far? My staycation ended up being two months instead of two weeks. lol Although I can't say I'm back in alignment fully, I can say I'm definitely focused and ready to dive into this art adventure now that I'm well rested.
As we come close to ringing in the new year, I've been reflecting on 2013 observing what I'd like to bring with me into 2014 as well as what I'd like to leave behind. After taking a good hard look at my life, it wasn't easy making the decisions I had to make. I had to let go of a lot in order to make room in becoming the Bunny I want to be.
What must I do in 2014 to lead a life of quality? What new attributes must I acquire to strengthen and refine my character? What fears must I overcome to get to the next level? How do I gain the strength necessary to lead a controversial impactful movement collaborating with fellow creatives? How will I serve those who believe in what we are doing? The answers to these questions were easy to answer. I know exactly what I intend to do, very confident and sure of where I'm going.
The hard part was letting go of certain people and releasing things about myself that didn't help me grow, that brought me down, or simply didn't deserve my investment. I felt heavy and toxic, but not quite sure why I felt that way. After listing all the things and relationships I wanted to leave behind in 2013, I felt empowered and ready to fill life up with quality experiences and genuine quality relationships.
It was sooo difficult letting go. It still is. I had to get rid of a lot so my heart would be lighter. Yet I was so afraid to let go, fearing a feeling of emptiness. What would be left in my life after I unload this toxicity? How do I fill myself back up again to nourish my soul? While my list got longer and my heart felt lighter, the fear of emptiness grew.
How do I let go of friendships I've had for over a decade, people I once loved with all my heart and shared so many wonderful memories with? To keep investing in a friendship/relationship that's not reciprocal simply because we've had so much history? When in reality I don't even know who this person is anymore? Those people have become familiar strangers to me. But was it healthy to keep these negligent strangers in my life just because they are somewhat familiar?
I knew I had to let go in order to move on. It was time to clean house. Choosing to put my energy into meeting new people, building new friendships while nurturing existing ones that are the most meaningful and sacred to me was a much more comforting thought. The kind of people I want in my life are genuine people who value me, my heart, my sincerity, those who celebrate me and value my loyalty, those who are positive and supportive of the Bunny I'm growing into, those who protect a friend's privacy like a mastiff. Most of all, friends who are true champions in life and are the first to courageously show up for you in your moment of weakness. Such people are incredibly rare, wouldn't you agree?
What will you let go of on this last day of 2013? Who and what will you take with you to be a part of your fabulous life in 2014?
Later I'm going to do some meditating to forgive (and ask for forgiveness), forgive myself for the mistakes I've made, be grateful for the lessons and clarity from those mistakes, bless all and release with love.
The only thing I'm taking with me into 2014 are the memories. Just the good ones, and putting them in a special place in my heart. It's a true celebration in honoring those I've had history with.